Everyone wants to be popular right? Of course, being a longtime member of deviantART, you deserve to have just as many pageviews/watchers/favorites as all those other drama whores. Well this article brings you closer to reaching that goal! Just follow all the steps as closely as possible and you'll be there in no time! Going from a rejected member of society to an amazing artist with more messages than you can handle is as easy as 1, 2, 3.

Step 1: Start off by submitting art you have stolen from *PearlEden (or perhaps someone else who is popular - be creative with who you steal from!). Meticulously write a long description about how hard you worked on the piece for days upon end, and how everyone should favorite the picture because you worked so hard on it.
Now go and post the link to your deviation on other deviants pages so as to alert them to your fantastic piece of artwork! I'd say about... 5 seconds would pass before all of deviantART would start attacking you about your theft. The'll tell you how much of a horrible person you are, so I would recommend responding in some foreign language - like Polish - and make fun of them while you are at it.

Step 2: If you managed to make it through that ordeal and still be not banned then well on you! You should now go and make a journal about how so-and-so stole your art and that it was originally yours even though they posted their piece about 2 years before you. The deviantTROLLS will come back with more spam and other such exciting topics!

Step 3: This is by far one of the most important steps in the entire process, so pay attention carefully! Make a journal about how you have some fatal illness, then a few days later write a journal pretending to be one of your family members talking about how you died. Wait until you get lots of "R.I.P"s on your page and a few pieces of art to "remember you by" and then make a journal about how it was all a joke by your sister. Or brother. Whatever works. Trust me, this scheme will get you a few thousand pageviews minimum!

Step 4: Now that everyone has *hopefully* gotten over your death you can back into the swing of submitting things! Take a Narutard screenshot and color over everything with neon colors. Submit it as your new character, Narubo! He's sure to be a hit. Keep doing this with many other screenshots until you've built up your gallery to a healthy level. You should now have a great collection of colored-over Naruto characters.

Step 5: The Naruto craze has subsided, so now it's time for some furry art! They are easy to do - just cover someone with fur, add some ears, tail, wings, claws, whatever, and you are good to go! To make your sparkledog an even bigger hit, give it some magical powers, a weird marking, some random accessories, and a sad past. Practically everyone will have a kawaii-gasm over it!
Maybe even draw two of your furry creations making out with each other, or other such obscene things. People these days love that sort of thing. Which brings me to the next step!

Step 6: POST NUDE "ART"(PORNPHOTOS). Oh man, the pornos on this site are everywhere! Just post some boobs and they'll come flocking. Perhaps even change your icon to boobs to capture more attention? Putting underwear on 8-year old heads is also attractive, or so =Teruchan thinks. Perhaps you'll get a DD for this one!

Step 7: Go crazy with favoriting, watching, and commenting on every page that you see. It doesn't even matter if you like the person - or their art for that matter. Just watch them. They will then feel obliged to come to your page to thank you for supporting them which may or may not lead to more minions watchers. Even if they don't watch you, hey, at least you got an additional pageview!

Step 8: Time to get back to journals. Make a series of controversial journals about things such as religion, science, racism, political views, death, etc. Everyone loves a good argument and what better than to start one yourself? Clearly state your opinion, and follow it with something like "I don't care what you think, my opinion is the only opinion and everyone else can suck my balls".

Step 9: You would like some critique on your artwork, yes? Go ask someone to critique your works and then get angry with them, and then get angry because they aren't pointing out any of the positive qualities in your work. I mean, come on! They are blatantly attacking you and being much too harsh for your preference. Pretend you have forgotten asking them for critiques in the first place, because that is irrelevant seeing as they seem to have a personal vendetta against you.

Step 10: Ok enough is enough. Everyone is being rude to you, and calling you a thief and giving you unfair critiques. Make a long sob-story journal full of your bawwwing about how you are leaving dA forever because nobody likes you. Then, once everyone has given you their condolences and is begging for you to come back, COME BACK! Haha you couldn't leave this place for more than a day, could you now? The perfect plan - get everyone all worked up about your future-absence and then come back in style. Works every time.

If all else fails...

Step 11: Draw some animu, or fanart for some other well-esteemed video game or television show. Like Pokemon, or Zelda for example. Then go back and repeat all steps until you are as popular as ~bleedman, who is probably one of the most popular people on all of dA.

I hope this advice has helped and you are well on your way to joining ranks with the "popular". ;D