A dedication to the woman I share the earth core with...



Daniela...
Lifetimes ago, when I was younger
and the Sun shone brighter



When I believed the stars were tears
shining just for me...



And when I felt so sad,
so alone
so scared...



I used to turn to angels
luminous beings bathed in light
unfettered by my darkness



I used to let them sing me to sleep
embracing me so tight



Daniela,
I never ran from the pain -
no -

I always sought it out

Clutching it to my heart,

and screaming out its name

the way the angels did for me



They used to tell me, that
by doing so

I could make it go away

Not by escaping it
but...
but by becoming it



**********



I used to dream...



I used to see such beautiful things



Whenever the sun fell from the sky
And darkness seeped into the horizon
revealing, with its coming,



the utter vastness of my universe
and the imminent beauty of my soul


And...



I used to die...
Every night
when the stars came



It wasn't my fault - I swear -
It was because they called to me
They spoke to me
They sang to me -
Always, always, the sweetest things they'd say
And always, always, singing to me
Singing to me...
my name...



I used to wish...
to not be so alone
to not be so free in my mind
and heart
I didn't want to hurt that way
To ache so terribly
so deeply



gasping for air
and life



against the vagaries of a solitary fate
a singular existence



I had never asked to burn so bright
to feel so small



I had never asked,
ever asked,
ever...
to be a star



I used to love...
Every breath was a dream
every soul was a star
every day was a lifetime
and I wasn't so far...
away



And...

once...

Once, I had a heart...
My God the way it burned...!



So... fiercely, in the night
Every beat, every pulse
rippled through me, a veritable symphony of emotion
...searing...
like starfire!



I felt everything
everyday
And every smile meant the world to me



inspiring me to say
How smiles echoed for eternity
For eternity
and a day

within

that

heart...